Do I need to tell you how much I love my nephew? He falls into the "amazing" range so easily.
The resiliency and stamina, driving skills, everything..........I love him.

Christmas

Christmas is the time of year that pomposity reigns supreme in my family. My sheer awe of my rogue sisters perpetual facebook status updates is living proof that dysfunction still rules. As she continually creates the facade that all is well, ( indeed, perfect would be more accurate ) she is one small step away from spending the beginning of the new year on the 4th floor at Swedes, ordering bland hospital foods and chain smoking with other mentally ill malcontents. I am still floored that we shared the same parents and similar upbringing, and even more stunned that we may share DNA. My personal theory is that Marlin Perkins dropped her off as a cruel experiment, unfortunately, this is not likely. As much as I love my family, I can honestly say that I would not recommend even WADING in my gene pool. My Christmas wish is that my sister would have a dawning of reality and that I would not be required to hit her in the mouth to bring it about.

Home shopping

I am deeply concerned about my current fascination with all of the shop at home networks popping up on my cable tv. HSN, QVC....you know the ones. As I channel surf to avoid watching the barrage of ads that surface every three minutes in the middle of my favorite show, I end up, ironically, watching the only commercial that lasts longer than the most syndicated of soap operas. I do not watch soap operas because they have no end or beginning, and hold no interest for me at all. I will, however, gaze mindlessly at the sparkle of Lucite bracelets and huge clunky rings for hours before I realize that I have been sucked in. What is that? They must be geared exclusively for women, because my couch commando grip on the remote control goes on complete hiatus. I may be trying to figure out how many ways one can explain a piece of gaudy, brightly colored plastic as a necessity, however, it is probably the comfort of the home shopping hawkers voice and the knowledge that whatever they happen to be selling, I know they will eventually bore me to sleep. Have you ever NOT seen them selling to women? Even the camcorders can be ordered in pink! I know why it is not as appealing to men, if they just included some more explosions, the male demographic would be much more likely to tune in. So, now that they know the secret, I will need a kickback. Since I have shared my two cents, I will need at least three for sharing....

Pets

I have a dog that I love dearly, and much to my chagrin, he loves to take one mouthful of food after another from his bowl from the dining room, to eat it in front of the television. (Dropping kibbles and bits along the way.) His favorite time to do this is right after I have vacuumed. I know that I, myself, enjoy eating in front of the tv, but really! Why don't I move the bowls you ask? Because eating from the bowl just wont do!  I have tried it, and he still drops sharp particles of dog food all over. It would be convenient if he could just keep it in one area...I am not opposed to picking it up from the floor. But I never find it until it is lodged deeply in my foot and my hands are full of something so I cannot dislodge it and I am obligated to hop on one foot to find a chair and some peace of mind. I do love him, and wish that he could possibly be my dog forever, but his life expectancy is limited and I must deal with that.  Thank the Lord for animals, that indulge us in tranquility, if only momentarily, and sheer frustration the rest of the time......they are Gods earthly blessings and saving grace!

What can I say about the importance of family? there can never be enough of them and they can never reach a crescendo of irritation quite enough for me. not only do they have the advantage of learning exactly which buttons to push, they know how and when to push them. this knowledge is obtained by their constant presence and sheer determination. because of their DNA equivalent, they are exquisitely keen at finding the exact spot to insert knife and twist.